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Tie strings to clouds

A lot of the music I listen to, while beautiful, is often quite depressing. Lately, I have been in a bit of a funk and I realized that music isn’t helping me get out of my funk. My attitude wasn’t helping me get out of my funk. It’s ok to be depressed from time to time, but not succumb to it until it sucks your soul.

I don’t want days where it is a struggle to move off of my futon…Not with the nice weather we’ve been getting. Not when I have so much to be thankful for…Not when I think all I need is a little confidence.

SOO, I’m taking some initiative. I’m making changes in my life step by step to find happiness. I’m cutting out dead weight, being thankful for the friends I do have and trying to be more confident with who I am. I took a step toward being more self-confident by actually giving a guy I’ve been crushing on my number and talking to him some. I’m not sure anything will happen or come from this, but it is definitely a start and a step up from my previous wallflower nature. I’m also taking greater pride in my work. I have done some amazing things and I should be proud to say that in the less than two years that I’ve even held a professional camera, I’ve been able to shoot alongside photogs from the Rolling Stone and New York Times.

And I’m making smaller changes: more gym time, healthier foods, volunteering, working on a novel…stuff like that. Oh, and I cut off my hair. Over ten inches gone and donated. That was a good improvement for the summer and I think the weight off my shoulders has helped my attitude, too.

So since I’m feeling like actually doing stuff with my life aside from wallowing about the stuff I don’t have, I’m forcing myself into this new aesthetic. That’s easier said then done, so I’m getting some help with some motivational tunes. Lately, Jonsi (of Sigur Ros) has been doing the trick.

Watch the official video for “Go Do” and try not to feel like running outside and getting something accomplished.

Here are the lyrics (they’re a little rough grammarwise, but hey, not bad for a guy from Iceland!):

Go sing, too loud
Make your voice break- Sing it out
Go scream, do shout
Make an earthquake…

You wish fire would die and turn colder
You wish young eyes could see you grow older
We should always know that we can do anything

Go drum, too proud
Make your hands ache – Play it out
Go march through crowds
Make your day break…

You wish silence released noisy drummers
You wish white noise surrendered to summers
We should always know that we can do everything

Go do, you’ll know how to
Just let yourself, fall into landslide

Go do, you’ll know how to
Just let yourself, give into flood tide

Go do!

Tie strings to clouds
Make your own lake – Let it flow
Throw seeds to sprout
Make your own break – Let them grow

Let them grow (Endless summers)
Let them grow (Endless summers)

(Go do endless summers)

You wish surprise would never stop wonders
You wish sunrise would never fall under

You wish surprise would never stop wonders
You wish sunrise would never fall under
We should always know that we can do anything

Go do!

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2 Responses

  1. Ohh, Miss B. I knew you were upset and stressed about some things, but I didn’t know it was this bad. Please let me know next time. I can’t really fix much, but sometimes even just telling someone you’re sad can help. At the very least, I will make you some cookies, or an upbeat mix cd. Or we’ll hang out at Tea Drops.

    I hope these new changes help lift your spirits. I am so proud of you for talking to the boy the other night. You have every reason to be confident. You are incredibly beautiful and talented, and any boy would be lucky to have you as part of his life, whether that is as a friend or as a girlfriend.

    Keep your head up and keep on with the changes. It is good to hear that you are taking these steps. 🙂

  2. “I think the weight off my shoulders has helped my attitude, too.”

    brilliant wordplay!!!!

    love you!

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